Sunday, May 10, 2015

The Case for Going Out and Doing More Things Alone

The Case for Going Out and Doing More Things Alone

Long before I met my fiancé, I spent a lot of my free time alone. I relished meals out, afternoons in the park, and seeing what movies I wanted (always dramas). People would ask if I didn't feel lonely, but the answer was simple: I liked my own company. Sure, there were times when I wanted to share my experiences, but I preferred to do things at my own pace.

Now a new study proves I was right all along. As Rebecca Ratner, a professor of marketing at the Robert H. Smith School of Business, tells Washington Post, "people decide to not do things all the time just because they're alone. But the thing is, they would probably be happier going out and doing something."

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In her study, "Inhibited from Bowling Alone," which will appear in the Journal of Consumer Research, Ratner and co-writer Rebecca Hamilton, a professor of marketing at the McDonough School of Business, explain that people consistently underestimate how much fun they'll have doing something alone, such as seeing a movie. For example, in one of the five experiments they conducted, people predicted they'd enjoy attending an art gallery less on their own when in fact, they enjoyed it as much as they would have with company.

The problem is people are too self-conscious. "If we get people to see that it's okay to do something for pleasure on their own that's the way to get rid of the stigma," Hamilton said. She's right: As someone who's travelled alone, both abroad and in the States, I can attest that no one could give a damn what you are doing. But that takes getting used to.

My advice: Bring a book along for the ride and take ownership of your down time. You won't get it at lunch and you probably won't get it at home, especially if you share cable. Life is short, so why not enjoy it at your own pace? I did, and my life's all the richer for it.

From: Esquire

NEXT: 17 Adorable Dining Nook Decorating Ideas



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Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Seeking to obey God in the midst of whatever circumstance I’m facing is what positions me in the flow of God’s power

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He said: “Listen, King Jehoshaphat and all who live in Judah and Jerusalem! This is what the LORD says to you: ‘Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s.’” — 2 Chronicles 20:15

Thought for the Day: Seeking to obey God in the midst of whatever circumstance I’m facing is what positions me in the flow of God’s power.

Tucked away in the Adirondack Mountains of New York, Camp-of-the-Woods is an amazing getaway for families — great chapel preaching every morning, no TV, crystal-clear lake, campfires, fishing, putt-putt golf, shuffleboard, and more game playing than you can imagine. It’s also an incredibly beautiful place with all kinds of scenic views and walking trails. So when some exercise-loving friends suggested we join them for a moderate family hike, we thought that was a great idea.

Well, it turns out their definition of moderate came from an entirely different dictionary than mine. Actually, an entirely different planet, if I’m being completely honest. Honey, honey, honey... this was no moderate hike. I had pictured a path with a gently winding, upward slope. But what we actually experienced was more like scaling a cliff face made entirely of rocks and roots. Not kidding.

And we were at an altitude so high my lungs felt like they were stuck together and incapable of holding more than a thimbleful of breath. Lovely. And forget having any type of conversation. All I could do was mutter a few moans between my gasps for air. Up, up, up we went. And when another group of hikers passed us on their way down and cheerfully quipped, “You’re almost halfway there!” I wanted to quit. Halfway? How could we be only halfway?!

I pushed. I pulled. I strained. I huffed and puffed. And I might have even spent a few minutes pouting. But eventually, we reached the top. I bent over, holding my sides and wondering how a girl who runs four miles almost every day of her life could feel so stinkin’ out of shape!

Climbing up the mountain against the force of gravity was hard. Really, really hard. But coming down was a completely different experience. I navigated the same rocks and roots without feeling nearly as stressed. I enjoyed the journey. I noticed more of the beautiful surroundings and had enough breath to actually talk all the way down.

About halfway down the trail, it occurred to me how similar my experience of this hike was to my Christian walk. Starting at the top of the mountain and working with the force of gravity was so much easier than starting at the bottom of the mountain and working against it. Although I had to navigate the exact same path both directions, being in the flow of gravity made the journey so much better.

It’s just like when I face a hard issue in life.

Operating in the flow of God’s power is so much better than working against the flow of God’s power.

Seeking to obey God in the midst of whatever circumstance I’m facing is what positions me to work in the flow of God’s power. I still have to navigate the realities of my situation, but I won’t be doing it in my own strength. My job is to be obedient to God, to apply His Word, and to walk according to His ways — not according to the world’s suggestions.

God works it all out

God, in His way and timing, works it all out.

That’s what happened with King Jehoshaphat in 2 Chronicles 20. He stayed in the flow of obeying God in his actions and reactions. I’m sure if he had tried to figure out how to win this battle based on his limited strength and numbers alone, he would have surely given up. Judah was outnumbered. No question. But instead of counting themselves out, the king and his army counted God in and determined to do exactly as He instructed.

I want to participate in God’s divine nature rather than wallow in my own bad attitude and insecurities.

Then I won’t have to huff and puff and pout while trying to figure everything out on my own. I stay in the flow.

Lord, help me to trust that You’ve got it all figured out and to remember that I don’t. Help me to say yes to You even when it’s hard. Help me to say no to anything that doesn’t align with Your Word. Amen.

Excerpted with permission from the Unglued Devotional: 60 Days of Imperfect Progress by Lysa TerKeurst, copyright Zondervan.

* * *

Your Turn

Have you ever walked at a normal stride onto an escalator or an airport people mover that was going the opposite way? That might be fun exercise but it’s not the way we want to walk in our spiritual lives — working so much harder and wholly on our own effort! Pause and ask the Lord to show you in what area you may be living out of alignment with God’s Word and see what happens when you adjust to His way. Join the conversation on our blog! We want to hear from you! ~ Devotionals Daily

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BENJAMIN WATSON: How to Lead Your Family Well

#067: How to Lead Your Family Well with New Orleans Saints Tight End Benjamin Watson (Podcast)

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Being a dad is our most important job and, when something is our job, we need to understand our mission. So what is our mission as fathers? To love and lead our families well.

On today’s podcast episode, New Orleans Saints tight end Benjamin Watson share the 3 keys to family leadership: love, trust, and courage. Benjamin talks about how dishonesty is the number one thing that can ruin intimacy. A breach of intimacy also shows that there is a lack of trust with your spouse. Your wife needs you to be vulnerable and to let your guard down and so do your kids. So what else do they need from you? Listen in for more on How to Lead Your Family Well with New Orleans Saints Tight End Benjamin Watson.

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Discussion Recap 

The 3 Keys of Family Leadership: 

  • Love
  • Trust
  • Courage

Episode Resources 

Like Benjamin on Facebook

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Check out Benjamin’s website

Check out Benjamin’s foundation

3 Keys to Family Leadership

How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship

Unlocking the Door to Intimacy in Marriage



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Monday, May 4, 2015

What is the Oxford comma and why do people care so much about it?

What is the Oxford comma and why do people care so much about it?

Vintage card34r2

The Oxford (or serial) comma is the final comma in a list of things. For example:

Please bring me a pencil, eraser, and notebook.
The Oxford comma comes right after eraser.

Use of the Oxford comma is stylistic, meaning that some style guides demand its use while others don’t. AP Style—the style guide that newspaper reporters adhere to—does not require the use of the Oxford comma. The sentence above written in AP style would look like this:

Please bring me a pencil, eraser and notebook.

Unless you’re writing for a particular publication or drafting an essay for school, whether or not you use the Oxford comma is generally up to you. However, omitting it can sometimes cause some strange misunderstandings, such as in this news notification from 2013: 

Image via Twitter

Image via Twitter

or in cases such as this one:
I love my parents, Lady Gaga and Humpty Dumpty.

Without the Oxford comma, the sentence above could be interpreted as stating that you love your parents, and your parents are Lady Gaga and Humpty Dumpty. Here’s the same sentence with the Oxford comma:
I love my parents, Lady Gaga, and Humpty Dumpty.

Those who oppose the Oxford comma argue that rephrasing an already unclear sentence can solve the same problems that using the Oxford comma does. For example:

I love my parents, Lady Gaga and Humpty Dumpty.
could be rewritten as:
I love Lady Gaga, Humpty Dumpty and my parents.

What do you think about Oxford comma? Share your thoughts in the comments!



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Sunday, April 26, 2015

The House That Wisdom Built Series

The House That Wisdom Built Series :: 8/4/13 AM

house_wisdom

The House that Wisdom Built

Prov. 24:3

Intro: There are two words that I want to focus on this morning as we begin this new series on the home.  These two words are “builded” and “established”.  These two words are actually synonymous.

Definition:

Builded – to build, to establish, to make permanent

Established – to be set up, be established, be fixed; be stable, be secure, be enduring

That’s where we want to begin in this series.

Wisdom builds a home that will endure.

In a time where there is very little commitment in the home, God wants to build homes that endure.

  • Husbands committed to their wives.
  • Wives committed to their husbands.
  • Parents that are committed to their children.
  • Children that are committed to their parents.
  • Families that are committed to God.

One of the things I learned when I was building houses was the importance of building for endurance.

When building a house, you build a strong foundation.

When wisdom builds a house, it does it properly; permanently.

Wisdom doesn’t build shacks, and lean-to’s and shanties.

Wisdom builds something solid, something real, something of worth and substance.

Part I

It is Built to Endure

Turn to Psalm 112:1-10

A. An Enduring Fear – vs. 1 Blessed is the man that feareth the Lord

Definition of “feareth”: to fear, be afraid; to stand in awe of, be awed; to fear, reverence, honour, respect

  • Psalms 111:10  The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: a good understanding have all they that do his commandments: his praise endureth for ever.

A house that wisdom builds is build with a healthy fear of God.

A reverential fear that permeates every area of the home.

Verse 1 says that he delighteth greatly in his commandments.

This is an atmosphere where the precepts of God are not despised; but they are a delight.

This is a home where the family stands in awe of God’s person and His power.

It is a reverential fear that lasts all week. Not just on Sunday morning.

B. An Enduring Family – vs. 2 His seed shall be mighty upon the earth; the generation of the upright shall be blessed.

When wisdom builds a house, it produces a family that can stand the test of time.

Satan is the instigator of division, strife, splintered families, divorce, unfaithfulness.

That is not God’s plan. It never has been.

The Bible is clear. Marriage is a covenant between a man and his wife and God.

  • Mark 10:7 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife;  And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh.  What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

God intended for man and wife to be married for life.

And God intended for families to stay together.

God never intended for children to run away from home and live with other people and on the streets.

Mark 10:7 says that a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife.

The home is a sanctuary from the world, evil influences and temptation.

The house that wisdom builds is a haven from the world and its wickedness.

God promised in Psalm 112 that the God fearing man would produce a family that shall be mighty.

MIGHTY: champion, chief, excel, giant, men’s, mightiest, strongest

God said that the house that wisdom builds will produce a family of champions; excellence.

What an encouragement!  What a promise!

C. An Enduring Faith – vs. 6, 7

Vs. 6 – Surely he shall not be moved for ever.

MOVEDto totter, shake, slip, be moved, be overthrown, to dislodge, let fall, drop, to be greatly shaken

A house that is built on wisdom is one that is built on faith.

The house that wisdom builds is full of committed, dedicated, stable believers.

The foundation has been placed in Someone that is far greater than any problem.

The homes of the ungodly are built on emotion, fear, lust, greed, and selfish desires.

The home that is built by wise men is founded on something that never changes – God.

Notice verse 7, 8 – He shall not be afraid of evil tidings: his heart is fixed, trusting in the LORD. His heart is established, he shall not be afraid, until he see his desire upon his enemies.

NOTE: The Hebrew word for “he shall not be afraid” is the exact same word for “fear” in verse 1.

The house that wisdom builds will produce a reverential fear for God – not circumstances.

Bad tidings is everywhere.

  • On the news
  • In the paper
  • On the radio
  • On your voicemail
  • In your Inbox
  • In your bank statement
  • In your mailbox
  • In conversations with friends and family

A wise man that fears God is not moved by these things; his heart is fixed.

FIXED: to be established, be stable, be secure, be enduring

Conclusion:  This concept of endurance is used repeatedly in this chapter.

  • Vs. 2 – his seed shall be mighty
  • Vs. 3 – His righteousness endureth for ever
  • Vs. 6 – surely he shall not be moved for ever; the righteous shall be in everlasting remembrance
  • Vs. 7 – his heart is fixed
  • Vs. 8 – his heart is established
  • Vs. 9 – his righteousness endureth for ever

If you’ve never been born again; never put your faith in trust in Christ, why not let him replace that temporary life for one that will last.  Why not let him give you the gift of eternal life?

Part 2

Proverbs 24:3-5

II. It is Built to Educate

Intro: Our text makes at least three references to the importance of the learning process.

  • Verse 3 – by understanding it is established
  • Verse 4 – by knowledge shall the chambers be filled
  • Verse 5 – a  man of knowledge increaseth strength

When wisdom builds a house, it builds a house where education is a vital component of the home.

  • Proverbs 1:5  A wise man will hear, and will increase learning; and a man of understanding shall attain unto wise counsels:

NOTICE our TEXT in PROVERBS 24:6 For by wise counsel thou shalt make thy war; and in multitude of counselors there is safety.

QUOTE“The doorstep to the temple of wisdom is a knowledge of our own ignorance.” Charles Spurgeon

The Bible is filled with many references to the importance of learning.

In Proverbs alone, we find these references to God’s thoughts on education.

  • KNOWLEDGE – 41 TIMES
  • LEARNING – 4 TIMES
  • INSTRUCTION – 25 TIMES
  • UNDERSTANDING – 53 TIMES
  • FOOL – 41 TIMES
  • FOOLISH – 13 TIMES
  • WISDOM – 53 TIMES

Wisdom doesn’t build a house based on ignorance, foolishness, and confusion.

Wisdom builds a house that stresses the importance of learning, knowing, understanding and being teachable.

I’m not talking about being a genius or having a high IQ.

I’m talking about having a desire to know more and to understand the important things in life.

QUOTE“It is not that I’m so smart. But I stay with the questions much longer.” ― Albert Einstein

If we are to have a home that honors God and reflects a godly, wisdom that is from above, we will have homes where there is an atmosphere of increased learning.

  • Deut. 6:5 And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might   And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart:  And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.

A. Educate on Morality

There is a lot of emphasis placed on a righteous life in the book of Proverbs.

Even in our text we find it referenced several time.

  • Psalm 112:1 – that delighteth in his commandments.
  • Psalm 112:2 – the generation of the upright shall be blessed
  • Psalm 112:3 …his righteousness endureth for ever.
  • Psalm 112:4 – Unto the upright there ariseth light…he is righteous
  • Psalm 112:5 – A good man…
  • Psalm 112:6 – the righteous shall be in everlasting remembrance
  • Psalm 112:9 – his righteousness endureth for ever

When wisdom builds a house, it stresses the importance of living according to the laws of God.

Parents and children alike need to be taught that there are is a right and a wrong.

Starting in chapter 1, Solomon begin teaching his children the importance of avoiding the sinful crowd.

  • There is a right crowd, and a wrong crowd. – 1:10
  • There are right activities, and wrong activities. – 11-14
  • There are right paths, and wrong paths – 1:15

In chapter 5, he warns of the dangers of the strange woman and the sin of adultery.

  • NOTE verse 1 – attend unto my wisdom
  • NOTE verse 23 – he shall die without instruction

More teaching follows on the sin of adultery and sexual immorality from 6:20 – chapter 7.

NOTE: You must have a consistent standard of morality in the home to be effective in teaching.

You can’t teach morality in the home and send your children to a school that endorses immorality.

You can’t teach morality in the home, and let your children be influenced by the immorality on TV.

You can’t teach morality in the home, and then excuse immorality in your own life.

You can’t teach morality in the home and then go to a church where the pastor has been married two or three times.

You can’t teach morality in the home, and listen to music that promotes immorality.

B. Educate on Money

  • Proverbs 24:4  And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches.
  • Psalms 112:3  Wealth and riches shall be in his house: and his righteousness endureth for ever.

Today’s children are taught the world’s perspective of money.

They are taught to play the lottery, to invest in stocks and bonds, and to lay up their treasures on earth.

  • Matt. 6:19-21  Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:  For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.
  • I Tim. 6:8-10  And having food and raiment let us be therewith content. But they that will be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition.  For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.

The house that wisdom builds in Psalm 112 is a house that understands that the secret to having riches is to give.

  • Vs. 4 – he is gracious and full of compassion.
  • Vs. 5 – A good man sheweth favour, and lendeth
  • Vs. 5b – he will guide his affairs with discretion
  • Vs. 9 – he hath dispersed, he hath given to the poor

QUOTE“Making money isn’t hard in itself… What’s hard is to earn it doing something worth devoting one’s life to.”

  • Acts 20:35  I have shewed you all things, how that so labouring ye ought to support the weak, and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive.

Teaching our children what the Bible teaches about giving, and about wealth, and about money is a sign of a wise house.

Teach your children to tithe and to give to people in need and to support their local church.

Teach your children to understand faithful, consistent giving to world missions.

A wise man understands that prosperity is a BYPRODUCT of wisdom; but not the world’s definition of wealth.

A wise house will be a prosperous house.

QUOTE“Wealth consists not in having great possessions, but in having few wants.”

C. Educate on Might

  • Proverbs 24:5  A wise man is strong; yea, a man of knowledge increaseth strength.

The world’s definition of strength and might is carnal.

Their strength is displayed on a weight room, a ball field, a political arena, a courtroom or in a financial capacity.

In the house that wisdom builds, might is strength of character in the midst of negative influences.

Might is the ability to say NO to the wrong crowd.

Might is the ability to live for God in a wicked and perverse generation.

Might is the fortitude to be faithful to your wife, provide for your children and fear God in all you do.

Might is knowing your Bible and being able to produce Biblical proof for what God said.

  • Acts 18:24  And a certain Jew named Apollos, born at Alexandria, an eloquent man, and mighty in the scriptures, came to Ephesus.

David was known as a mighty man when he was just a young boy that demonstrated responsibility when doing his job.

  • 1 Samuel 16:18  Then answered one of the servants, and said, Behold, I have seen a son of Jesse the Bethlehemite, that is cunning in playing, and a mighty valiant man, and a man of war, and prudent in matters, and a comely person, and the LORD is with him.

Might according to God is shown by having character, discernment, responsibility, maturity and spirituality.

Might is the ability to raise a generation of children up in the old paths.

Might is the skill to point your kids to God.

  • Psalm 127:3  Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.

Might is the Divine assistance that enables you to live victoriously over sin.

  • 2 Corinthians 10:4 (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)
  • 2 Corinthians 13:3 Since ye seek a proof of Christ speaking in me, which to you-ward is not weak, but is mighty in you.  For though he was crucified through weakness, yet he liveth by the power of God. For we also are weak in him, but we shall live with him by the power of God toward you.

Might is the ability to lean upon the everlasting arm of Almighty God each and every day.

  • Zechariah 4:6  Then he answered and spake unto me, saying, This is the word of the LORD unto Zerubbabel, saying, Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the LORD of hosts.

Conclusion:  The HOUSE THAT WISDOM BUILDS is a house where God’s definition of money, morality and might is taught and obeyed.  In order to submit to God’s will on these issues, it is imperative that those within the home submit themselves to the gospel and allow the saving power of Christ to transform their heart and mind.  Accepting Jesus Christ as your personal Savior is the first step to having a wise and godly household.

Part 3

III. It is Built to Exemplify

Intro: The house that wisdom builds is a house that is a testimony.  It is a witness.  It makes a statement.  It has an impact on those that see it.  It will build a house that will have an effect on people that see it, and it will impact their life.

  • Psalm 112:10 The wicked shall see it, and be grieved: he shall gnash with his teeth, and melt away: the desire of the wicked shall perish.

A. It will Exemplify the Fear of God – vs. 1

  • Psalms 111:10  The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: a good understanding have all they that do his commandments: his praise endureth for ever.
  • Proverbs 1:7  The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.
  • Proverbs 9:10  The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.

B. It will Exemplify the Favor of God

  • vs. 1 – blessed is the man
  • vs. 4 – unto the upright there ariseth light in the darkness
  • vs. 9 – his horn shall be exalted with honour

C. It will Exemplify Fervency for God

  • Proverbs 9:1  Wisdom hath builded her house, she hath hewn out her seven pillars:

The hewing out of seven pillars demonstrates a dedication, commitment and a strong desire.

Those pillars were no doubt made of stone, or granite.

Took time and effort.

Not something you would undertake half-heartedly or on a whim.

The number seven is a type of completion and perfection.

Wisdom doesn’t stop until the job is complete; until it’s right!!

Solomon is an excellent example of this type of wisdom.

Solomon’s fervency for God was exemplified in:

  • II Chron. 1:10 in his prayer for wisdom and knowledge.
  • II Chron. 2:1 when he determined to build a house for the name of the Lord.
  • II Chron. 3 and 4 by the expense of the construction of the Temple.
  • II Chron. 5 by the installation of the Ark of God.
  • II Chron. 6:1-11 by the sermon that he preached.
  • II Chron. 6:12-42 by the prayer that he prayed.
  • II Chron. 7 by his dedication of the Temple.

BUT – when the Queen of Sheba showed up in chapter 9, his love for God was exemplified in several ways.

I. Exemplified by your Abode – vs. 3 …and the house that he had built.

Is your home a testimony – a witness – of your fear of God, your fervency for God?

Is there anything in your home that would detract from your impact on unbelievers or struggling Christians?

II. Exemplified by your Appetite – vs. 4 …and the meat of his table

What are you eating (spiritually)?

What does your diet consist of?

What are your children eating in the home?

I’m not talking about physical food, but spiritual (or carnal) food.

What kind of diet are you living on in your house?

What kind of TV programs do you watch?

What kind of movies to you look at?

What kind of music is playing in your home?

What is on the walls? In the closets? On the computers?

  • Matthew 4:4  But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.
  • Psalms 112:1  Praise ye the LORD. Blessed is the man that feareth the LORD, that delighteth greatly in his commandments.

III. Exemplified by your Attendance – vs. and the attendance of his ministers

The word attendance here is the ministry; the duties, the labor that was going on within his house.

What is your ministry? What is your duty?

What are you and your household doing to demonstrate your fervency for God?

When the world looks at your family, does your home exemplify a fervency for  God?

IV. Exemplified by your Apparel – vs. 4

Does the apparel of those within your home exemplify a fear of God?

I’m not sure what they had on in this verse, but it was an overwhelming testament of Solomon’s wisdom!

Your clothes say it for you!

What you wear is saying something to those around you.

V. Exemplified by your Ascent to the House of God – vs. 4

Again, there was something special about the way that Solomon went to church that impressed the queen.

It was something to behold.

It was something special and very significant.

She was overwhelmed by the way and the manner that Solomon went to the Temple.

QUESTION: Would the way you attend church exemplify to the world a life of wisdom and fear of God?

Would it testify to them of a fervent spirit?

Conclusion:

In Psalm 112:10, it says that the wicked shall see it and be grieved.

In II Chron. 9:3, 4 it says that when she saw the house that wisdom had built, there was no more spirit in her.



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